On Target #1 - How To Be Understood - Part One

Do you want to be understood? Do you need for people to "get you"? Of course you do. It is a basic human need. Unfortunately our lack of communication skills and awareness of the listener often get in the way.

Most of the time we are our own worst enemy and we're not even aware of it. The inability to communicate effectively has a huge cost not just for your business but you personally.

So how do you know if people really "get you"? And if they don't (God forbid), then what can you do about it?

Who better to shed some light on this than an expert in interpersonal communications.

Recently I had an opportunity to interview Dr. Ingeborg Hrabowy, an expert in the area of business communications. She is a Cleveland, Ohio based clinical psychologist who specializes in helping individuals and businesses with the human side of business. Ingeborg is often sought out by businesses to help sort out complex and sensitive people issues. In these situations she leverages her experience as a psychologist to help with leadership development, conflict resolution and crisis intervention.

Ingeborg is a very engaging and lively person. As a skilled storyteller she uses examples from her work to illustrate the pitfalls of poor communications. Her stories alone are worth the time to listen.

I recorded the interview and will play it for you in two segments.  The second segment will run in the next edition of On Target in two weeks.

For streaming audio click the player below.

Show Notes:

Here's a list of a few of Dr. Hrabowy's key points from the interview.

Below is a list of some of the things that cause miscommunication:

1. Lack of Clarity
2. Lack of Specificity
3. The speaker is not aware of what they want to accomplish
4. Awareness of the skill set of the receiver
5. Emotional maturity of the individual
6. Awareness of whether the receiver receptive of defensive
7. The speaker's level of self-awareness
8. The participants' ability to read non verbal cues (body language)
9. The listener's interpersonal skills

The two areas where managers need the most help in communicating:

• Self awareness
• Desire and willingness to learn and improve

Two things you can do right now to improve your communication skill at work (or at home):

• During the next week make a point to practice and observe the effect your communications have on those around you. Ask someone close to you to give you feedback about their understanding you what you said.
• Each time you communicate something important, check for clarity by asking the recipient to explain their understanding of what you said.

For more information about Dr. Hrabowy you can visit her page at the COSE (Council of Smaller Enterprises), or Psychology Today.